Strengthen Your Words

You’ve heard the idiomatic phrase, “Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never harm me” (Alexander William Kinglake, Eothen). We all know this is not true. Words have the power to hurt, to crush, to damage, to blame, to shame, to condemn, to sour one’s attitude; and, words have the potential to encourage, to inspire, to equip, to energize, to share, to delight, to lighten one’s attitude.

While it likely has been some time since you studied for a vocabulary test, strengthening your vocabulary and your intentional use of words is essential to grow as a person. The ability to keenly communicate using words is a crucial skill to living an effective life, so, expressing yourself clearly and authentically takes depth of vocabulary.

In her book, Atlas of the Heart, Brene’ Brown, a social researcher, wrote about the breadth of meanings in eighty-seven identified words for human emotions. Dr. Brown suggests the language we use, the words we use, impacts our ability to “…[cultivate] meaningful connection” (https://brenebrown.com/book/atlas-of-the-heart/). While I don’t personally agree with how Brown and her research team define some of the words, I was intrigued by how the highlighted words’ clear meanings enhanced my perception.

Someone in my family has called me “bossy” since I was a child. This was not meant as an endearment; it is a pejorative term. Because this person lacked confidence and often employed a passive-aggressive tone, this was said to tell me not to assert myself because it made her uncomfortable. Recently, I asked this family member to stop calling me this word and to reimagine it as the word that actually describes one of my traits: ‘leader.’ Look at the shades of difference between ‘bossy’ and ‘leader.’ One is negative, derogatory; the other is positive, favorable. Calling someone a name labels them * and contributes to how they * develop their * sense of self. Parents have a huge responsibility to strengthen the words they use with their children. Words chosen well are beneficial.

How do we strengthen our words? Reading more exposes us to a variety of vocabulary. Consider how words have shades of meaning and choose our words precisely. We can edit, revise our words to convey accurately what we mean to say. Words can wound and words can inspire. It’s our choice.

* While using plural pronouns to replace a singular noun or pronoun is technically not Standard English grammar, modern use of the plural pronoun allows for respectful gender neutrality.